Stardust And Shadows Read online

  “Of course I’m Ryker, and we’re half brothers. I explained all of that last week. I was shocked to discover you didn’t know we were kin; it’s no secret, even if most people dare not speak openly about the grim truth, especially to outsiders. We look alike because that’s a normal trait for our race: sons always take their fathers’ images. Since Galen Saar was our father, we both favor him. But I did take my mother’s blond hair and green eyes because Androasian genes are almost as potent as Maffeian ones.”

  “I am well acquainted with how advanced your technology is and that your knowledge is far superior to my planet’s. I’ve seen your medical miracles at work, including on me after I angered you while trying to escape your clutches on your ship. Have you forgotten how you struck me in reflex when I attacked you and your men? You had my injury healed within a day. Is that how Tris removed the cleft in your chin and added that scar on your right jawline to match the one Ryker possessed before you killed him? Tris is very talented; he even smoothed out some of the smile lines around your mouth and eyes. You’re wearing green contact lenses to conceal your blue eyes and your black hair is dyed blond, but I’m not fooled. Have you forgotten I saw you convincingly disguised as him after you rescued me?”

  “Look closely into my eyes, Jana. See ho iris covers. They’re green. The scar has been left for years to remind my half brother and the others of his temper and hatred. If it troubles you, I’ll have it removed today. But I won’t change other things to make me look more like him, not even for you.”

  With his face close to hers, she looked into his emerald eyes. Varian’s sapphire ones had glittered with vitality and a fiery passion for life. Ryker’s were as dark, impenetrable, and lush as a tropical jungle nearing nightfall. Her gaze studied the scar that appeared old. No sign of recent surgical alterations could be found. He smiled then. Varian possessed a grin that could dispel the darkest gloom of night: quick, easy, radiant, and sexy, one that seemed to flow over her like warmed honey. Ryker smiled with the left side of his mouth: slow, reluctant, but also sexy. Their mannerisms, voices, and expressions weren’t the same. Even their colognes were different. He was right, but… Varian Saar was known for his cool head, steel nerves, sharp wits, and rigid control. Somehow this was Varian still in his Ryker disguise! She had gone to sleep in his arms after making passionate love to him; she couldn’t have dreamed that! “It’s a trick. But why? To try to get Ryker’s secrets and inheritance, just as Shara said you would. Do you need to impersonate him to make certain our marriage is legal so all is not lost to you and Maffei? Do you need time to take what you desire from Trilabs before news of his death is released and you’re confronted by Kadim Maal’s retribution on you and the Alliance?”

  “I’m not impersonating Ryker, Jana; I am Ryker, your husband. I haven’t been killed or harmed, and no one is trying to take anything from us or Trilabs. You’re confused, that’s all.”

  Jana shook her head. “I told you Ryker was good to me and we were becoming close friends. You’re afraid I fell in love with him, aren’t you? You’re being vindictive because you think we slept together. Why should that bother you, Varian? You’ve possessed women from one end of the Tri-Galaxy to the other. You spent months attracting and repelling me like a cruel magnet. After all you’ve done to me, why would my being drawn to a kind and gentle man like Ryker surprise you and provoke you to such extremes?”

  “I don’t understand you. Rages of Fate, woman, what happened to you during your illness? How could you have forgotten everything we’ve said and done?”

  “What about the portrait over there that Shara showed to me before she tried to murder me?”

  He looked baffled and concerned. “My mother is dead, Jana. She has been for seven years; she murdered Galen and Amaya Saar, then killed herself. Her body lies in state in the Androasian palace of my grandfather, Kadim Maal Triloni.”

  “Shara said that wasn’t her body on display. I met her here. She told me all kinds of awful things before she tried to kill me. She told me everything about the past and their future plans.”

  “You couldn’t have seen or spoken with my mother, Jana; she’s long dead. When we visit Grandfather soon, you can see the truth for yourself.”

  “Then explain the portrait behind that curtain and what’s in the safe over there.” She motioned over her head to the wall behind her.

  “What are you talking about, Jana?”

  Jana glanced over her shoulder: they were all gone! “But … I don’t understand. She showed me a portrait of you without your disguise; you and Varian looked like twins. She said there were journals in a safe she pointed to behind the portrait, diaries she kept since she was a girl. She said that you saved her after she used cryonic chemicals to induce suspended animation to fool everyone into thinking she was dead. She said she was going to slay me and take my identity, that you had left to snare Varian in a lethal trap. I was drugged and couldn’t fight her. She said you two …” Jana halted the rush of words. Her gaze darted about the room as she sought reality and truth. What if, she fretted, he wasn’t Varian?

  “It’s the illness and fever, Jana. You’re suffering from delusions. I showed you Mother’s picture and related the past to you just before you became ill. Everything’s gotten mixed up. But don’t fret—your scientific mind will clear as soon as you’ve fully recovered. Unless, of course, the medication leaves you with partial amnesia; that happens in certain cases— a side effect on alien systems. I hope not. We made a great deal of progress in our relationship in the past week.”

  Jana’s brain frantically reasoned. If her rescue was real and Varian loved her, why would he do this? Yet, with her medical training, she couldn’t argue that what he was telling her was impossible. On Earth, certain types of anesthesia and medication caused short-term memory loss. He looked and talked like Ryker, but she was convinced it was Varian Saar standing before her. She had been drug-dazed during her terrifying confrontation with Shara and she had been emotionally dazed during her passionate lovemaking with Varian after his rescue. But those two episodes had occurred … hadn’t they?

  Jana gazed at the area between her breasts where Tris had used direct cardiac puncture to revive her; no mark was there, not even discoloration or soreness. The same was true of her throat, where Shara had jabbed in a syringe to inject a dose of medication she hoped would be lethal. Her wrists exposed no signs of the straps Shara had used to secure her helpless to the laboratory table. Yet, with their technology and elapsed time, those things could have been removed. If her suspicions were true, that meant they had gone over every inch of her body to remove any clues to her recent trauma, including the hangnail, which was the reason she had come to Ryker’s medical lab that fated day. She wished to fetch a tiny scissor for repair of it but instead she had encountered Shara and peril. Hadn’t she? With their technology, Varian could have been made to look like Ryker, as he had done when she last saw him. Hadn’t he? With his knowledge of his half brother’s ways, with the aid of Ryker’s videotapes, and with Shara’s diaries, Varian could easily impersonate the Androasian prince with perfection. Whatever Varian’s scheme was, she wasn’t going to fall for it. “How long have I been here?” she asked.

  “Almost five weeks. Two as my wife, or rather twelve days.”

  “That’s wrong. Ryker and I married a few days ago. That same day, Ryker said he was leaving on business but he really went to …” She watched the way he looked at her, as if warning her she was going too far with her challenge of his honesty. My God, what if you are Ryker? If none of that happened, Varian did discard and betray me. She couldn’t halt the tears from leaving-her eyes to flow into her touseled sunny hair. She didn’t want to be in this place with this alien. She. didn’t want to be a captive, a prisoner, forever. She wanted to go home, to Earth, to Texas, to her room, to her bed. She wanted her old life returned. She wanted her friends, especially her best friend, Andrea McKay. She wanted safety and peace. Was this horrible nightmare, she fretted in p
anic, to be her destiny?

  “Dreams and hallucinations can seem real, Jana, but they aren’t. This is real: you and me in our private world together. We were beginning a good life together. Don’t spoil it because of your wild and cruel delusions.”

  Her troubled gaze fused with his imploring one as he wiped away her tears. “I don’t know what to think or believe anymore. Every time I make a new beginning, he sneaks into my life and destroys it: on Earth, on his ship, at Draco’s, on Eire with his grandfather, then with you. How could it seem so real?”

  “The illness and medicine, Jana; they played tricks on your mind. Everything that’s happened to you since he captured you got twisted up while you were delirious. You’re safe here; I promise. Varian is out of your life forever, and he’ll be married to Canissia Garthon soon.”

  Canissia Garthon! She scoffed at mention of the name of the woman obsessed with Varian, the woman who had tormented her and whom she believed—according to her “delusion"— had kidnapped her and brought her to Darkar to be destroyed by Varian’s archrival and fierce enemy.

  “At first I accused you of being sent here as Varian’s spy and assassin. After I spent time with you, I realized I was wrong. He manipulated you many times and almost destroyed you. I thought it had stopped. Destiny sent you here to fill the voids in my life and heart, and I in yours. We’re perfectly matched, Jana. You’re my wife as the fates designed. See, you’re wearing my marriage band.”

  Jana gazed at the gold bracelet encrusted with precious gems on the top side, the alien equivalent of a wedding ring. The underside engraving gave Ryker Triloni’s name and their marriage date. Was she still Ryker’s property and in his control, and Varian … She felt weak, confused, afraid, and heartbroken. Merciful God, she prayed in trepidation, can this be real?

  “I’m your destiny and your protector, Jana of Earth,” the blond alien vowed.

  Be he Varian or Ryker, alien lover or alien husband, the question was the same: “But who will protect me from you? I’m nothing more than an alien captive, a lowly charl, a slave; that’s all I can ever be in your world.”

  “You’re wrong, Jana of Earth; you’re no longer a chart and you were never born to be a captive mate in my galaxy or in yours. You’re free; you’re my wife: that was our bargain, remember? Your freedom in exchange for marrying me. You will remain free as long as you remain my wife. If you run away or break our contract, your right to liberty is revoked by law, a law created to prevent alien women from tricking their owners into freeing them. You signed the agreement; it’s legal and will be enforced. But I ask you, don’t push me into doing that. I much prefer how things were before you fell ill.”

  Please, God, let me wake up. Let this be only a nightmare.

  “I do hope your mind clears soon and you remember what’s happened between us. If not, I’ll have to woo you and win your trust once again. My half brother might hate alien enchantresses and reject one for a mate, but I don’t feel that way about you. I never believed in charl laws and the Androasian Empire has never practiced them. I hear Martella Karsh is trying to have them abolished; I hope she succeeds, for they aren’t needed any more for Maffei race survival.”

  He seemed to be trying to dispel her fears and doubts, but would Ryker behave and feel as this man claimed in this situation? As if she accepted his words, she asked, “Why didn’t you, or Varian, or someone, tell me you two are half brothers besides being fierce rivals?”

  “When I realized you didn’t know, Jana, I told you. Don’t you remember?”

  “No, I don’t. I know you hate each other because of the past. When I met Supreme Ruler Jurad Tabriz and his son Prince Taemin on the planet Lynrac during the charl auctions .. .” she began, referring to the leaders of the neighboring Pyropean Galaxy Federation, “Jurad first mentioned Shara’s name before me. He hinted at a conflict and hatred between himself and the Saars because of her loss as his bride long ago. He wanted to purchase me to become Prince Taemin’s wife. Varian was furious. And I couldn’t believe he would treat high rulers in such a vile manner. Your name was mentioned briefly as Jurad’s ally. At the time, Jurad seemed kind to me; he withdrew his marriage offer to appease Varian’s temper.”

  “How did Varian explain his rash behavior?” the alien asked.

  “He didn’t. When he ordered Nigel Sanger, his first officer, to get me out, Nigel told me there were long-standing troubles between them that he couldn’t tell me about. When I asked questions about Shara and Ryker, I was ordered never to speak the names again. Nigel said it had to do with dark and deadly affairs in the past that brought out the worst in Varian. After witnessing his behavior, I knew that was true. Nigel claimed the Tabrizes only wanted to get their hands on me so they could torture me and slay me as revenge on Varian.”

  “Is that all you heard about us and our troubles before we met?”

  “No. While I was living with Draco,” she explained about the Maffeian who was her secret guardian for a short time, “I saw Jurad again at a party. He seemed pleased that Supreme Councilman Procyon had purchased me. When I pressed for information about the past, he mentioned the names of Galen and Amaya, and Kadim Maal Triloni. From my studies of the Tri-Galaxy on my way here, I knew Kadim Maal was the ruler of the Androas Empire in the next galaxy. He told me you and Varian were fierce enemies and led me to believe Amaya was Varian’s lost love, not his mother as I learned later by accident. He said Shara killed Amaya, Galen, and herself seven years ago. Until recently, I thought Galen was Varian’s ‘brother. Jurad said he was to marry Shara but she fell under the spell of the Star Fleet officer who was transporting her across the Maffei Galaxy as a sign of truce. He wanted me to believe the Commander Saar he was speaking about was Varian, not his father, Galen. He said you and Shara were of the same royal bloodline but never explained you were mother and son. He said: ‘Until all Saar blood is spilled, the conflict between the Trilonis and Saars and the Tabrizes and Saars will not end.’ That’s all I knew until .. .” She paused a moment.

  “I learned the rest of the truth here. As I’m sure you know, none of that personal information was in the books we were given to study. I can understand how Varian would hold Shara to blame for his parents’ deaths, but that doesn’t explain his fierce hatred of you, Kadim Maal, and the Tabrizes. I can also understand your hatred of Galen for his negative effect on your life, but that doesn’t explain your fierce hatred of Varian—not to the point of you two, half brothers, wanting to kill each other. Surely there’s more to the story than I’ve been told. Or recall you telling me.”

  “I don’t want Varian’s fortune, rank, or his life,” he answered calmly. “Our father stained the Saar name with his treachery long ago. As Varian and others would have you and everyone believe, Galen was not innocent in the episode with my mother. She didn’t force him to have a love affair with her, not from what she told me and Grandfather long ago. I do admit Mother went mad and destroyed all of them. That was wrong. A person can’t force another person to love her, or him. In fairness to my father, perhaps he was briefly overcome by her beauty and charms. Perhaps he couldn’t resist her. Some women are irresistible, Jana—women like you.”

  She tried not to recoil from his touch because she wanted answers. Somewhere in the midst of their hostilities lay clues to the truth she needed.

  “Galen’s crime wasn’t in ending the affair, it was in succumbing to my mother, then accusing her of bewitching him with drugs and spells. Since my mother was skilled in those areas and arts, it was a cunning excuse for him when he came to his senses and realized the treachery he had committed against the Androasian Empire and Pyropean Federation, an intergalactic war-provoking deed. To choose Shara would cost him too much; he would have been compelled to give up everything in Maffei—including Amaya, his unborn first son, and his Star Fleet rank—to live out his days in Androas with my mother and our people. He lied to get out of his self-dug trap. He rejected me even though my face exposed him as my father. He humiliated th
e Trilonis before the Tri-Galaxy. That’s what drove my mother insane. I suppose she assumed the anguish and shame would not end until Galen was dead. After the foül deed, she couldn’t accept his loss and, having been denied him in life, she joined him in death. You can’t blame Grandfather for hating the Saars; they cost him his only child, heir to the throne. The wound was cut deeper when the Maffei Interplanetary Alliance refused to doubt and punish Galen.”

  “Perhaps because he was the Kadim’s son-in-law and Supreme Commander of Star Fleet,” Jana said. “During my journey here, we captives received excellent training and schooling, so I know about the politics of your world. A kadim is the highest and most powerful ruler in a galaxy. In Androas, it’s your grandfather, Kadim Maal Triloni. Here, it’s Varian’s grandfather, Kadim Tirol Trygue. It would be hard for people who loved and respected men of Galen’s and Tirol’s ranks to doubt their words.”

  “Just as it was impossible for people who loved and respected Shara to doubt hers,” the blond alien countered. “The Androasians and Pyropeans didn’t doubt her. Yet, galaxies do not go to war without proof of crimes perpetrated against them. The truth died with the only two people who knew it—my mother and father.”

  As she listened, Jana Greyson studied him. They had so many similarities and yet so many undeniable differences … “Don’t you think it’s smart to possess such self-control? So many lives could be lost upon words that can’t be proven false or true.”

  “Of course I agree. War should never be entered lightly. Sometimes, all one has is another’s words upon which to base a decision or action.”

  She saw him ruffle his blond hair with his … right hand as Ryker would. She gazed at his chin where no sexy dent was located. Perhaps she could think clearer if he wasn’t so near and enticing … “What if that person lies to you and deceives you?” she asked huskily.

  “I haven’t done either to you, Jana of Earth. I am one of the richest, most powerful, most respected, feared, and envied men in the Tri-Galaxy. I own my own world and I am heir to a throne and empire. What do I lack that slaying Varian can bring to me? I have the only thing that I desire from him: you, Jana, no matter his sly motive for sending you to me. Varian lied to you when he claimed I demand to be his rival and foe. It is he who hates and fears me. He cannot bear having his father’s bastard alive and prosperous. He cannot forget or forgive me for being the son of the killer of his parents.”